Online Safety Checklist for Kids: What Parents Need to Know

What to check before your child goes online

Online safety for kids comes down to a few concrete things you can set up and monitor right now: knowing what apps and sites your child uses, understanding what information they're sharing, setting limits on screen time and contact, and knowing how to respond if something goes wrong. You don't need to be a tech expert — you need to know what to look for and what questions to ask your child.

This checklist walks you through the actual steps. Some apply to younger kids, some to teens. Start with the ones that match your child's age and what they're already doing online.

Key Takeaways

• Check your child's phone or device settings for privacy controls, app permissions, and location sharing — most phones have these built in and turned off by default.
• Know which apps and websites your child uses regularly, what information those apps ask for, and whether your child has a public or private account.
• Set clear rules about screen time, who they can message, and what personal information (name, address, school, phone number, photos) never goes online.
• Talk with your child about what to do if they see something upsetting, receive a message from a stranger, or feel pressured online — and tell them you won't punish them for telling you.
• Review your own privacy settings and what you post about your child, since what you share affects their safety too.

Device settings and permissions to lock down

Start with the device itself. Both iOS (Apple) and Android phones have built-in privacy controls. On an iPhone, go to Settings > Privacy and check what each app can access: location, camera, microphone, photos, contacts. Turn off anything your child doesn't need. For example, a messaging app doesn't need access to your child's location or contacts unless they specifically use that feature.

On Android, the process is similar: Settings > Apps > Permissions. You'll see a list of what each app can do. Disable location sharing, camera access, and microphone access for apps that don't need them. Also check Settings > Location and turn off location services entirely, or set it to "only while using the app" rather than "always."

Turn off app installation from unknown sources. On iPhone, this is already restricted. On Android, go to Settings > Apps > Special App Access > Install Unknown Apps and make sure it's off. This prevents your child from downloading apps outside the official app store, where you have less visibility into what they're getting.

Set up screen time limits. On iPhone, use Screen Time (Settings > Screen Time). On Android, use Digital Wellbeing (Settings > Digital Wellbeing). Both let you set daily limits by app category, schedule downtime, and require a password to extend time. You can also see which apps your child uses most and for how long.

What to know about the apps and sites your child uses

Ask your child to show you the apps on their phone or the bookmarks in their browser. For each one, find out: What does your child do there? Do they have a public or private account? Who can see what they post? Can strangers message them? Does the app collect location data?

Common apps for kids and teens include YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, Snapchat, Discord, Roblox, and Minecraft. Each has different privacy risks. YouTube and TikTok can recommend videos to anyone, including strangers. Instagram and Snapchat let you message people you don't follow (though you can turn this off). Discord and Roblox connect kids to group chats with people they may not know. Minecraft has online multiplayer where your child can interact with other players.

For each app, check the privacy settings together. On Instagram and TikTok, set the account to private so only approved followers can see posts. On Snapchat, go to Settings > Who Can and set "Contact Me" to "Friends" only. On Discord, check the server settings to see who can join and who can message your child. On Roblox, go to Settings > Privacy and turn off the ability for strangers to message your child.

Know whether your child is using a real name or a username. A username is safer than a real name, especially on public accounts. If your child uses their real name, make sure their account is private and they're not posting their location, school name, or other identifying details.

Information your child should never share online

Have a clear conversation with your child about what stays private. The list includes: full name (username is fine), home address, school name, phone number, email address, birthday, passwords, and photos that show their face or location. Also include financial information — your child should never enter a credit card number, even for a "free" game or app.

Explain why: someone online might use this information to find them in person, pretend to be them, or scam them. Make it concrete. "If you post a photo from your school soccer field, someone could figure out where you go to school and when you're there." "If you give out your phone number, someone could call or text you pretending to be your friend."

Talk about photos specifically. Once a photo is posted, your child can't fully control where it goes. Someone can screenshot it, share it, or edit it. Remind your child that photos of them in a swimsuit, underwear, or anything that makes them uncomfortable should never go online, and that no one should ask them for such photos.

Set a rule: if your child is unsure whether something is safe to share, they ask you first. Make this easy by saying you won't get angry if they ask — you want them to ask.

Monitoring what your child sees and who they talk to

You don't need to read every message, but you should spot-check. Ask to see your child's recent messages, friend list, or followers once a week or once a month. Look for: accounts with no profile picture or real name, people your child doesn't know in person, messages that seem odd or make your child uncomfortable, or requests for personal information or photos.

Pay attention to your child's mood after they've been online. If they seem upset, withdrawn, or secretive about what they're doing, ask what happened. They might have seen something disturbing, received a mean message, or been contacted by someone who made them uncomfortable.

Know what your child is watching on YouTube or TikTok. These apps recommend videos based on what your child watches, and recommendations can quickly lead to upsetting content — violence, sexual material, or conspiracy theories. You can restrict YouTube to YouTube Kids (which has stricter content filtering) or check your child's watch history regularly.

For younger kids (under 13), consider using parental control apps like Apple's Screen Time, Google Family Link, or third-party options like Bark or Net Nanny. These let you see which apps your child uses, set time limits, and get alerts if your child tries to access restricted content or if certain words appear in messages. For teens, these tools are more about transparency — tell your child you're using them and why.

What to do if something goes wrong

Before something happens, tell your child what to do. If they see something upsetting (violence, sexual content, hate speech), they should close the app and tell you. If a stranger messages them or asks them to video chat, they should not respond and should tell you. If someone asks for a photo or personal information, they should say no and tell you. If someone is being mean to them online, they should block that person and tell you.

Make it safe for your child to tell you. Say: "I won't take your phone away if you tell me something bad happened. I want to know so I can help." If your child has been sharing information they shouldn't have, don't punish them — instead, help them understand why it was risky and what to do differently next time.

If your child receives a message from someone pretending to be a friend or asking them to keep a secret, that's a red flag. Explain that real friends don't ask you to hide things from your parents. If an adult online is paying special attention to your child, asking personal questions, or trying to move the conversation to a private app, that's also a warning sign. Tell your child to block that person and tell you immediately.

If your child has shared a photo or video they regret, or if someone is harassing them, you can report it to the app or website. Most apps have a "report" button. You can also contact the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (NCMEC) at CyberTipline.org if you believe your child is being exploited.

What you should check about your own accounts

Your privacy settings affect your child's safety too. If you post photos of your child online, you're sharing information about them. Check your own privacy settings on Facebook, Instagram, and other social media. Set your accounts to private so only your approved friends can see your posts. Don't post your child's full name, school name, location, or daily schedule.

Be careful about what you share in comments and captions. If you post a photo of your child at their soccer game and tag the location, you're telling the internet where your child is and when. If you post about your child's school or activities, you're giving out identifying information.

Check who can see your friends list and who can tag you in photos. Adjust these settings so only your friends can see this information. Also review old posts — you may have shared things years ago that you wouldn't share now.

Frequently Asked Questions

At what age should I let my child have a phone or social media account?

There's no single right age — it depends on your child's maturity and what they need it for. Most social media platforms require users to be 13 or older. Many families give kids a phone between ages 10 and 13, often starting with a basic phone that calls and texts only. If your child gets a smartphone, start with limited apps and built-in parental controls, and increase freedom as they show they can handle it responsibly.

Should I be friends with my child on social media?

Yes, if your child is on social media. Being friends or following them lets you see what they're posting and who's interacting with them. Your child may feel less comfortable posting certain things if they know you're watching, which is the point. You don't need to comment on everything — just observe. For teens, you might agree that you'll follow them but won't embarrass them by commenting on every post.

What if my child is being bullied online?

Help your child block the person doing the bullying. Most apps have a block button. Save screenshots of the mean messages in case you need them later. Report the messages to the app or website. Talk to your child's school — cyberbullying that involves other students at the school may violate the school's conduct policy. If the bullying involves threats or sexual content, contact local police.

How do I know if someone online is trying to groom my child?

Grooming usually starts with someone building trust — asking personal questions, giving compliments, showing interest in your child's life. They may then ask for photos, suggest moving to a private chat, or try to isolate your child from parents and friends. If an adult online is paying unusual attention to your child, asking them to keep secrets, or asking for photos, that's a warning sign. Tell your child to block that person and report them to the app.

What should I do if my child has already shared personal information online?

Don't panic. Help your child change their passwords, review their privacy settings, and delete any posts that contain personal information. If they've shared their phone number or address, monitor for suspicious calls or mail. If they've shared photos, ask them to report the posts to the app. If someone is using their information to impersonate them or scam others, contact the platform and consider reporting it to the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov.